Essentials Of The Faith / Sunday Morning Sermon Series / Romans

Romans 12:9-13 Part 1

     Perhaps they saw the total chaos in their family; which may have meant that the bill collectors calling every night, the children screaming and crying, the teens with green spiked hair, rooms painted black and their body tattooed and pierced. Perhaps the relationship with the spouse was strained or distant and they wanted more or out.

     Some didn't want to go home because they recognized their failure as a parent or spouse and they didn't believe things would change, that they would find understanding let alone love and forgiveness by their family. The gnawing, constant pain of their inability to keep up with what was expected was often too much for them to handle. Homecoming to individuals like these is no fun and they stay away as much as they can. They become workaholics or have numerous hobbies and activities that keep them from dealing with the hurt of being home.

     You have been celebrating our home coming this morning. You celebrate the beginning of the Sunday School year and the return to our regular worship schedule.  You have been encouraging your family and friends who have not been consistent in their attendance to come home to God's house and to make a commitment to regular attendance.

     But have you ever thought that there are those for whom a homecoming back to church would be too painful to bear?

EXP: There are some who have been abused by the church. Yes, there are people in some churches who may not be physically abusive, although that happens too, but who are cruel, harsh, vindictive, and bossy, in actuality they are emotionally or spiritually abusive to some in the church family. So much so that some people leave and don't want to come back to church.

     There are also those who are not abused by people in the church but who believe they failed to live up to either the expectations of those 'in' people of the church or to their own personal standards. Without biblical exhortation by loving Christian friends they often feel like a failure before God and the church.

    They also fear what will happen to them if they do come home to God's church family after being away so long and failing the way they believed they did. 'Will they understand, will they accept me...can they ever love me again?' Every time they think about coming home to God and His people, the pain of their failure and the fear of the unknown  is often too great to bear and they stay away.

Background: Folks, this is real..and it's sad to think that a person would be afraid to come to church or return to church because they had a fear of being abused, avoided, unforgiven....even unloved.

     Didn't Jesus say in John 13:35 'By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.'

 What happened? What happened? If love is so evident in the church by God's people why does Paul bring it up again and  in a big way here in Romans 12:9ff? Because we have character deficiencies and are prone to forget or even worse to try to love on our own terms...either way, we sin as God's people and we hurt our brothers and sisters in Christ.

     Paul is about to present to us his 'must do' list for character development as God's people. The requirements for living together as a family, as THE family of God. The closeness of the Christian life and worship was new to the Gentile and Jewish Believers in the Roman church...Guess what? It is new for many of us today as well. Apart from our relationship with Jesus Christ, we may not have naturally come together as friends.

     But it is because of our new birth into the family of God that we are required to come together as ones closer than friends, as brothers and sisters for all eternity in Christ Jesus! And that is why Paul tells us here how to live as a family and he starts with changing the way we think about loving others.

Trans: Open your Bibles to Romans 12:9 where we will find that  God's people must display godly character.
            First as we relate...

I. To other Believers (Rom. 12:9-13)
    A. By their Love (Rom. 12:9-10)
         Paul begins with the place all other character traits begin. That which is the most important...Love.  And he tells us three things about Love as a vital character trait in the Christian, especially as he/she relates to the family of God.

        1. Loves Quality: Sincerity
                  Let love be w/o hypocrisy.

DEF: Love = agape = a God like love that loves  regardless of the circumstances.
        A deliberate love that decides to keep on loving even if the love is not returned or appreciated.

DEF: hypocrisy = to role play or pretend, to wear a   mask.

     Obviously, there were some in the early church who were only pretending to love their brothers and sisters in Christ.  Perhaps it was because of the differences in how they worshipped, or how they spoke or dressed or whether they ate meat sacrificed to idols or not. (sounds like some of the same problems today)

     Whatever the reason they knew the command of Jesus to love one another yet they tried to do it on their terms.  They were hypocrites, perhaps they only pretended to love of get what they wanted or to look spiritual. They did not have a sincere love for the brethren.

     Paul tells them and us, don't play games with love. If you claim to be a disciple of Jesus, you must prove it by your sincere, honest love and display it in your loving treatment of others.

Trans: The quality of love is reflected in ones sincerity. Paul goes on to tell us about the morality of love.

        2. Loves Morality: Hate Evil, Cling to what is Good
             Believers who sincerely love others display a heightened sense of morality. They demonstrate their love for others, Paul says, by hating evil and clinging to what is good.  Hate and love may seen incongruent but hear me out. Hating evil and clinging to good as a way to truly love can be understood two ways.

             a. The believer should always want the best for another. Agreed? Therefore, love fights against any and all evil done to our brothers and sisters in Christ.  It is not enough to fight against the evil we must replace it with good. The believer is to desire the best, only what is good for others and then actively
work toward that good.

Gal 6:10 'So then, while we have opportunity, let us do good to all men, especially to those of the household of the faith.'

             b. The Believer is to personally abhor, and loath anything that is evil in our own lives. No one is right before God or  one another who longs for sin and eagerly goes after it. No one is right before God who doesn't seek for and cling to what is good in his own life as well.

DEF: cling = to cleave, join, fasten together, to attach,   to cement or glue together.  To that which is good,  right, pure, lovely, excellent, and worthy of praise.  Get the idea?

Trans:  So, fight the battle against evil for your brother or sister in Christ. As well as evil in your own life... but then do good to others and cling to what is good yourself. Finally, Paul tells us the extend to are we to love one another.

     3. Loves Commitment: Be Devoted
         a. He tells us to be devoted to one another in  brotherly love. Be committed, labor at, strive to obtain a relationship of  'fil-adelfia ' or brotherly love.

DEF: fil-adelfia = The kind of affection and    kindness that is shared in a  close, loving, family

 We are to be committed, to strive to show affection and kindness to our brothers and sisters in Christ..

         b. Paul now tells us that our commitment to love one another in the family of God means that we are to give preference to one another in honor.

DEF: preference =  to go before, to lead
DEF: honor = reverence, respect, esteem

     What this means is out of respect for others, let them have the lead, let them go before you.  But we don't like to do this, do we? I deserve the attention, I deserve the credit after all it was my idea...we think.

     Imagine a church where all believers show their love for one another by actively and purposefully giving respect and esteem to others by allowing them to go first, to take the lead, to sit in the good seat, to get the spotlight instead of desiring it all for ourselves. To let the desires and wishes of others precede our own.

     O how God's Church today needs this kind of self-less love in action. Many are hurt and have retaliated by starting  trouble or quitting, taking their ball and going home.

     How much divisiveness and hurt has been felt by a brother or sister who was .... overlooked, not honored, not recognized, who was not given the best seat or credit for a job well done....

     Oh, friends, let them have it. Give into love and let go of your own rights, your own personal preferences. Why? To show love to them. And pray for me that I especially will to do this.

Conclusion
     These are not just Paul's words about how we are to live as a family, they are the very words of God, the highest authority known to man and God demands that we do all that His Word says. Faithfulness, remember?
 Someone once said 'Love is the circulatory system of the spiritual body of Christ of which we are all to be healthy, functioning parts.'

 I have put an insert in the bulletin that you can post on your refrigerator or put in your car or Bible.  Let's read it together.

 Read this to get the blood flowing when you forget or try to make love something of your own making.

 Read this to remind you of what it means to sincerely love your family in Christ especially when they do or say something
  that upsets you.

     I want you to think about those who attend CBC. Do you show the kind of love toward the brothers and sisters in Christ that Paul talks about here in Rom. 12:9-10 and 1 Cor. 13?

     How about those you know who used to come but who choose to stay at home on Sunday mornings? If they were to come back would they be assured of a love that is forgiving and sincere?

 Let's make coming to worship here a loving homecoming each and every week.